One of the many lessons learned while writing my book was one that combined Self Talk with Self Discipline.
I challenged myself to complete a project to the very end. I would always make excuses to not get started. Telling myself
I ain't no author.
I never took a writing course.
I’ll probably get started and stop somewhere in the middle.
I don’t know any connections in the publishing industry.
Anything I can think of to talk myself out of doing it..
After some life experiences, I saw signs for me to get started on that book. One of the first things I did was set a date. I gave myself 1 year to write a book. I signed up for Brian Tracy’s mailing list to get a Free Book Writing Template. That helped me plan out the book and pretty much drew the map for me to get to my destination easier.
I also listened to some podcasts and one author was telling us his first experience he had when he got started on his first book. What made me really connect with him was that he was doing the exact same thing I was doing, telling myself reasons why I can’t write the book. What he did after to help him finish his first book was his Self-Talk. He started telling himself
Writing a Book is Easy
Writing a book is Fun
I can write books quickly
When he started telling himself these words mixed in with belief that it was true, he said writing his first book wasn’t at all what he first thought of. His attitude changed when his words changed about himself and that kept him motivated to keep writing. After really diggin deep into self-talk and learning what I needed, I took the next step which is usually the hardest for most people
I opened up a Google Doc and just started writing using the template as a guide. During the first few days I found that I was always going back to correct mistakes. That would take a lot of time. The Red & Blue underlines notifying me of my mistakes was a distraction. I would then get sorta frustrated and stop writing. When the thought came, I took action on self talk and calmly said to myself
I am going to figure this out
I took the time to step back and give this a quick thought. To counter that, I found I just had to turn off the autocorrect. That would keep the color distraction away and with that I just kept on writing nonstop and would fix the spelling and grammar after.
Finally, I was just able to focus on writing along with being aware of my thoughts. During this time, I would tell myself with firm belief
I am a Writer
I am a Creator
I am Writing a book easily
I am a Author
However, I am still human and there would be days that I just did not want to write. Those voices would come up again and tell me to
You can do this tomorrow
You already did enough work
You can just write twice as much tomorrow
But I didn’t want to go down like that, I had that goal set that I looked at everyday, and this is when I really had to combine my self talk with self discipline. I started to question everything I was saying to myself talking me out of not writing today.
Why do I think I can just do this tomorrow?
Why do I think I did enough?
Why do I think I can write twice as much tomorrow?
After some thought, These words were coming into mind
Why aren’t you just DOING IT?
Why are you being lazy?
Why can’t you just stay motivated?
Again, saying that to yourself isn’t going to be any better cuz it’s like you’re really forcing it and putting too much pressure on you. Another lesson learned about self talk is
If your friend wasn’t having a good day, would you say those words to try and motivate them?
As I was looking at my situation from a different perspective, I noticed what if I just talked to myself as if I was talking to a good friend. What would I say to him to keep him motivated?
So instead of asking questions, why not find reasons? Find the reason why they should be writing everyday.
I would start telling myself statements like
Every word I write gets me closer to completing this book
Every sentence I write gets me closer to moving forward to freedom
Every paragraph I write get me closer to doing this full-time
Every page I write gets me closer to writing another book
These words I found were less judgmental and more motivating but were still half the battle. You can tell yourself these words all you want, but if you don’t take action on it, they're just that, Words.
Along with saying these words, I also had to get up, open up the laptop, and start writing. At times, I did say these words, but didn’t move. This would be on another topic of discussion, but I used Mel Robbins 5 Sec Rule to counter that. Where I would count back from 5 down to 1, get up and get started.
Did I write everyday? No….
I did have days where I didn’t write at all, lost control, or was off. However, I didn’t let that take full control, and didn’t let it take any momentum away as I still used self talk to stay disciplined. I would tell myself
We are almost there
It’s not that far from being done
That feeling I’ll get when I finish it
Putting these self-talk methods into practice made me really grow as a writer and as a person. I had originally set the goal of writing a book in a year. I made this announcement on Aug 16, 2022.
With Self-Talk mixed with Self-Discipline, I was able to complete my book much sooner than a year and now it will be released on February 23rd, 2023. That’s 6 months before my targeted goal. It wasn't an easy task, but like everything else you're new at, you get better. Through practice and time along with self awareness, you'll eventually find your way to grow your Self Talk and your Self Discipline. Don't give up, it's a process.
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